Love This Pain

My mom might of hit the nail on the head the other night about women and pain. Sometimes women love pain. I’m not writing about masochism; however, I do know some kinky chicks that get off on that. I’m talking about mental pain that can cause a person to  feel depressed and in some ways paralyzed in their life. I like to call those moments pity parties; however, there is definitely no fun associated with those types of parties. Heavy drinking? Now that all depends upon the person.

I’m guilty of enjoying mental pain. Not causing pain to others, but indulging in it in my own life. I never realized that I have enjoyed holding onto the feeling of emptiness. I feel sorrow and at times in solitude I sulk.  It has been my guilty pleasure, my distraction from the wonderful things I have in my life. There is no real reason as to why I hold onto pain, but realizing it may help me to release it.

I’m unsure of the cure, but I think realizing that the past is the past and all you have control of is the present maybe a good start. All people are affected by their past experiences. Some people continually replay horrific or traumatic experiences in their minds. Others may continually be hard on themselves for a past action or may ponder the constant 'what if' question. All of these thoughts lead to mental pain and for some it can hinder their ability to enjoy the present. It would be wonderful if all of us could hold onto the positive experiences in our lives versus letting painful experiences flood our minds and spirits.

Pain has produced some of the most beautiful poems, literature and love songs of our time. It is what makes dramatic movies so appealing. It is something that is hard to accept and hard to let go.